Solo Mom's Raw Breastfeeding Story: 13 Days in the ICU

Solo mother Tainá Goulart dreaded breastfeeding before her son Francisco was even born — and the reality in a neonatal ICU turned out to be harder than she had imagined. Four years later, pregnant again, she is sharing her story during Brazil's Agosto Dourado to help other mothers feel less alone.

What happened when Francisco was born?

Francisco was born with wet lung syndrome and was immediately admitted to the neonatal ICU, where he stayed for 13 days. His mother Tainá Goulart — a solo parent — never experienced the skin-to-skin golden hour she had dreamed of. Instead, her introduction to breastfeeding happened in a clinical milk-extraction room she describes as resembling an assembly line: sterile walls, electric pumps, mothers in silence.

Why was breastfeeding especially difficult for Tainá?

Tainá entered pregnancy already knowing the journey would be hard. She has epilepsy — meaning going without sleep is a medical risk, not just an inconvenience — and a cyst on her pituitary gland whose growth is measured by prolactin, the same hormone that drives milk production. Her neurologist warned her during pregnancy that breastfeeding would require a carefully built support network. As a solo mother, that network was thin.

What did the comparison in the lactation room do to her?

In the ICU milk room, Tainá watched other mothers filling two or three bottles — 100 ml, 150 ml at a time — while her total output over thirteen days amounted to just 3.5 ml. Exhausted and in the grip of postpartum fog, she convinced herself those women were better mothers raising better children simply because they produced more milk. "It sounds absurd to write now," she admits, "but that is what I felt, alone in that maternity ward from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m."

How did mixed feeding change things?

Francisco received infant formula, Tainá's small supply, and donor milk from a milk bank — a resource she credits as invaluable. When she told nurses "that's not my milk," they corrected her gently: "It is yours. You are thinking about it differently." That reframe, offered with warmth, stayed with her. Four years later, she is pregnant again and says she plans to approach breastfeeding differently this time, armed with experience rather than fear.

What is Agosto Dourado?

August is Brazil's Golden August (Agosto Dourado), a national campaign to promote breastfeeding awareness. Tainá's story is part of the campaign's effort to acknowledge that the breastfeeding journey is not always the soft-lit, armchair scene portrayed in parenting media — and that asking for help is not failure.

Key Facts:

Francisco spent 13 days in the neonatal ICU with wet lung syndrome.
Tainá is epileptic — sleep deprivation is a medical risk for her, not just tiredness.
She has a pituitary cyst monitored via prolactin levels, the same hormone that drives milk production.
Her total milk output over 13 days in the ICU lactation room was 3.5 ml.
Francisco received a combination of formula, his mother's milk, and donor milk from a milk bank.
Agosto Dourado is Brazil's annual August breastfeeding awareness campaign.